June 18

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Welcome to MightyMidlifers! Start Here!


Welcome to the MightyMidlifers website and community! I’m not sure how you got here or what motivated you to read about midlife. Maybe your life is going well but you’re feeling a little bored or blah. Or, you could be having a full-on midlife crisis or dealing with a spouse who is having one. No matter where you are in your midlife journey, we are here to help you find answers, give guidance, and provide direction.

The MightyMidlifers was founded with the intent to provide science and psychology-based answers to life’s most common challenges. We all experience ups and downs in life. For example, I have experienced job loss, divorce, major health issues, moved across the country, dealt with aging parents, and helped raise four children. This by no means gives me a corner on the market of life’s challenges, but I have learned to successfully navigate the challenges laid before me so far.  Life’s challenges are not over, and they will continue to pop up whenever they feel like it. The difference is that if equipped with the right skills and knowledge, we can successfully navigate midlife challenges and grow in the process. It is these skills and knowledge that we want to share with you. Our hope is that you will feel confident and excited to face your midlife years.

Experience versus Expertise

If you search the web for the term “midlife” or “middle age”, you will find very few if any sites that offer real solutions to real problems. What you will find, are a lot of 1-off articles written by journalists or bloggers who were asked to write an article on midlife crisis.  Their solution is to interview 10 friends or acquaintances about their experiences. I don’t know about you, but I don’t look for answers to my life’s challenges from random people who may or may not have relevant experience. I want answers from experts who have studied the subject. In short, I want expertise, not experience.

Experience is helpful because it can tell you what not to do. Expertise, however, is even more valuable because it can tell you what to do, why it works, and why other methods don’t work. The question is where and from whom do you want to get your answers from? The person with experience, or the person with expertise?

We live in an amazing world today. We have a million times more computing power in our pocket than NASA had to put a man on the moon. We also have a global ubiquitous internet that allows us access to almost any piece of information. So, the question is not if there are answers out there. The question is finding the right answers from sources you trust. There are lots of websites that will happily share their opinions on any given subject because writing about one’s opinions is easy. However, there are only a few sites that take the time to do the research to support what they are saying.

Science and Psychology-based

The fields of medicine and psychology offer most of the answers to life’s challenges. However, the reason that most people don’t look to scientific answers to their problems is that they are too hard to find or too difficult to understand. If you are like many people, remembering what A1C stands for whether it’s the HDL or LDL that’s bad cholesterol can be challenging. What’s worse, is that there is often conflicting answers to the same question. For example, it is hard to find a straight answer on whether we should eat eggs and real butter.

At the MightyMidlifers, we take the time to do the research on every topic we write about. We always share our sources, so you know where the information came from. We also explain the science and psychology in terms you can use and understand. And more importantly, we offer direction on how to apply the knowledge to your life right now. While the cliché’ phrase is “knowledge is power,” the truth is knowledge is only powerful when it is applied. And as Stephen Covey said, “To know, and not to do is really not to know.” It is not what we know but what we do with our knowledge that makes a difference in our lives.

Getting the Most Out of MightyMidlifers Content

Our content is structured in a way that is easy to consume and easy to apply. The articles describe a typical midlife challenge sharing common examples that you can relate to. We then share the applicable science and psychology in terms you can understand. After the science, we share application tips to give you ideas of how to apply it in your daily life. Finally, we create a short list of action steps to put your knowledge into use right away. Knowledge that is used is retained. Knowledge that is not used fades quickly. So, be ready to take some action.

Have you ever noticed how you can get twice as much done the day before vacation as any other day? This is the psychological principle of clarity of purpose in action. When we are clear in knowing exactly what we want, the various parts of the brain work together to help produce our desired result. However, when we are unclear about our purpose, our brain is easily distracted, and our energy is unfocused. Our productivity and ability to get what we want drops dramatically. When we have clarity of purpose, we can’t help but move in the right direction of what we desire.

MightyMidlifers can provide solutions, but if you’re not sure what you’re looking for, solutions can be hard to find. And, while this site can provide science-backed suggestions, if you are not willing to take action, then you won’t see results. We want to help, but we can’t help those who won’t take action.

Your First Assignment (5 Minutes)

If you have gotten this far, it means something has clicked with you. Whether it’s a vague feeling inside or a problem that’s staring you in the face, it’s important that you spend some time figuring out what you are looking for.

Here are three important questions to ask yourself:

  1. Why am I here?
  2. What would I like help with?
  3. What am I willing to do?

First, understand why you are here. What motivated you to come here? Was it a specific problem or a general feeling that you should be enjoying life more? Second, what specifically do you want help with? Many of the techniques that are taught on this site can be applied to a variety of life challenges. While general techniques are helpful, they don’t become useful until they are applied to a specific situation. You will get more out of this site if you have a specific challenge in mind. Finally, determine what you are willing to do. Change only happens if you do the work. It will probably take less work than you are thinking, but it will still take work.

You won’t need hours of time, but you will need to dedicate some time. Most of the Action Steps on this site take 10 – 15 minutes to complete. If you don’t have time to do them at the moment, schedule a time when you can do them. It’s your commitment to yourself to build a better life.

Next Steps

Follow these next steps to go from surviving midlife to thriving at midlife:

Step 1: Defining Midlife – What is midlife and why is it so challenging?

Step 2: Managing Midlife – How do I adapt to change?

Step 3: Assessing Midlife – Where am I now?

Step 4: Visioning Midlife – What do I really want?

Step 5: Exploring Options – How do I get to where I want to go?

Step 6: Choosing Your Path – How do I decide which way to go?

Step 7: Plan Your Path – Do I have the skills and resources?

Step 8: Dealing With Setbacks – What do I do when things don’t seem to work?

Step 9: Building Competence, Gaining Confidence – How do I improve?

Step 10: Readjust, Reset, Rinse, and Repeat – How do I get back to normal?

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Bruce Fleck, PhD

About the Bruce Fleck, PhD

I help professionals overcome a health, career, or relationship crisis and make it a turning point for building a better life.

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